~If and Only If~

~If and Only If~
It is not necessary for People and THings to have thorns To Hurt


In fond memories of mine you rest. Your smile, your face, your eyes, your tears define my life. It was not meant to be when you turned away, why didn’t you take the world away with you.

My world is like living hell. To remember I don’t wish too, But to forget I can’t. Your essence is still fresh as if it was minute ago. Saying bye was easy, following it isn’t.

I thought I was creating and attaching my memories with every event for you to remember me. But now it seems every colour of life leads to you. In flower I see you, thorns seem to resemble the pain you give, Cactus seems the ideal call for thee. Thus, I hate every colour cuz of what you did to me.

I wish to kill you the moment I see you, on second thoughts though I want to be with you. Like a magnet you seem. I may be the speck in your blooming world. Crush me and destroy me for everyday my hatered for you dwells. I hate myself for hating thee.

Thy finish me to never hear from me. I carve to hear your voice, I carve to see. I hate you more or I love you more is difficult to say. I can neither be away nor close. I conceal and serve my brain at your feet to destroy. I thought you knew me well and thus will hear the unsaid words that I shout out loud.

Life imprisoned am I. Bounded by the chains of love and Hate. I can’t avoid thee. I fear friends for I don’t want to be what I am not. Have lost myself once and thus can’t bear to lose it again even before recovering from the same.

Your fragrance keeps me awake at night. In my tears I see the flashes of past as glee they were as saddening they are now… I remember thy dates & numbers better than mine. My hatered towards you makes me do what you dislike and then my love for you makes me rectify my actions.


I just wished if and only if you liked me for once rather than using me. I was your slave and was ready to be forever and ever. I just wished if and only if you liked me for once.

I still pray for your good-will, to God I cannot say evil. If anyone may think elsewise, won’t I spare him. Set me free so as to move on, so as to live on. I beg my life back, I beg my happiness back, or if you cannot; take whatever is left of me also away.


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